To My Husband with Love

Allen Appel

St. Martin's Press

To My Husband With Love
Thanks, Dear, for ...
Noticing me.
 
 
Asking me out.
Asking me out again.
 
 
Choosing me over all the other girls you could have had.
Wanting to be with me.
 
 
Wanting to stay with me.
 
 
Luring me with your siren song.
Pursuing me.
Persevering, even though my father was against it.
Being handy.
Being willing to try many home repairs, even though things don't always work out. I'll love you anyway, even if you have to call in a professional.
 
 
Lifting.
 
 
Hauling.
 
 
Carrying.
 
 
Moving furniture. And then moving it again.
 
 
And again.
 
 
All without complaint. Or without too much complaint.
 
 
Being the Grillmaster.
Cooking. Every once in a while. Even though it's not one of your natural skills.
Helping out.
Taking out the garbage.
 
 
Painting.
 
 
Mowing the lawn.
Carving.
Giving me a bite.
Knowing when you've had enough.
Quitting smoking.
At least trying to quit smoking.
 
 
Asking for my opinion.
Asking for my help.
Not being ashamed to ask for help even when you know you're going to look stupid.
Taking me seriously.
 
 
Respecting my: Ideas Work
 
 
Respecting me.
 
 
Listening intently. Or at least looking like you are.
Listening to me drone on about my problems at work even if you don't know the people or care what I'm talking about.
 
 
Taking my suggestions, even when you don't think it's such a great idea.
Not holding a grudge, even when I've really screwed up.
Looking on the bright side.
Explaining things, when they need to be explained, without acting like a know-it-all.
Explaining about: Cars. Sports. What men really want.
 
Even if I already knew most of it. Especially the part about what men really want.
 
 
Keeping track of our financial affairs. Such as they are.
Not criticizing my driving, even though I know it's killing you.
Not lording it over me when I get a ticket.
Knowing when to keep your mouth shut in general.
Remembering our anniversary. Even if you need a little help.
Taking me on some excellent vacations.
Putting gas in my car, and checking the oil and the tires. I'm really going to try to do better with this. I know it's important, God knows you've told me enough times.
 
 
Understanding that we were created as equals and treating me as such. Most of the time. Except when it concerns sports or car maintenance.
Knowing I can take care of myself.
 
 
Loving me.
 
 
Being kind.
 
 
Amusing me.
Making me laugh.
Laughing with me.
 
 
Not laughing at me.
 
 
Showing a girl a good time.
Being my knight in shining armor. Even if the armor needs polishing every once in a while.
Sharing.
Never letting me down.
Not being a show-off. Usually.
Showing affection, even in public.
Forgiving me.
Forgiving me again. I know it's hard sometimes. But I swear I'm going to pay more attention to my car maintenance.
Fighting fair (pretty fair).
Knowing when to give in.
 
 
Knowing when to let me win.
 
 
Not holding it against me when I seem to be overreacting a bit.
Being reasonable when you're angry. (Well, wouldn't it be nicer if you were?)
 
 
Taking constructive criticism pretty well. Under the circumstances. Most of the time. Some of the time.
 
 
Making up after a fight.
Being a big enough man to admit it when you know I'm right and you're wrong.
Worrying.
Keeping fit. I know you're going to start any day now.
Humoring me. I know some of the things I ask you to do seem sort of silly, but ...
Being a gentleman.
Being a good provider.
Going for walks, even when you have other things on your mind.
Going shopping with me.
Going to events you hate just to humor me and not acting like a pill about it.
Being cool.
Being exceptionally cool.
Being honest.
Being my friend.
Bringing me flowers.
Dancing.
Dancing, even though you don't like to.
Dancing with my mother at the wedding.
Getting along with my parents (not the easiest thing in the world).
Not treating me the way your father treats your mother.
 
 
Buying me presents yourself and not just saying, "Go pick out something you like."
Bringing drama into my life.
Being patient, even when I'm being overly dramatic.
Not seeing our marriage the way some of your friends see theirs.
Bragging about my finer points.
Taking care of me.
 
 
Taking care of yourself.
 
 
Dressing up without complaint when the occasion demands it.
Keeping tidy.
Not mentioning my wrinkles.
Not minding that I've put on a few extra pounds.
In fact, not mentioning any of my imperfections.
Knowing when to turn a blind eye in general. It's a useful skill many men never learn.
Not snoring. Ha ha.
I know you can't help it.
 
 
Understanding that I have nothing to wear and need to buy some new clothes. Even though it looks like my closet is pretty full.
Letting me have the bigger closet.
 
 
Understanding that just because it appears that I have enough shoes, I don't really.
 
 
Just being a swell guy. Most of the time.
Being so suave.
Being so manly.
Being such a take-charge guy.
Turning up the thermostat even though you don't think it's cold in the house.
Getting out of bed and turning off the television.
 
 
Checking for burglars in the middle of the night even though it's cold out of the bed and there's never really been a burglar downstairs but I distinctly heard something and it doesn't hurt to be careful.
 
 
Getting up to turn off the light, check the stove, and make sure the doors are locked. Like I said, it doesn't hurt to be careful.
 
 
Being gentle.
Being rough, gently.
 
 
Romance.
Back rubs.
 
 
Front rubs.
 
 
Being flexible and open-minded when I come up with something new I'd like to try.
Making love.
 
 
Being sweet.
 
 
Trying to keep up when I'm feeling especially frisky.
Those great massages.
Having poetry in your soul, if not exactly on your lips.
Holding hands.
Not making a fool of yourself around other women.
Surprising me with your unbridled passion. (I think I'm going to faint!)
Thinking that I'm beautiful.
Keeping me satisfied.
 
 
Evolving, over the years, into a damn fine husband.
Telling me you love me. Even if you need a little prompting.
Being faithful. Always and forever.
 
 
Us. Always and forever.
TO MY HUSBAND WITH LOVE. Copyright © 2002 by Allen Appel. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations emboded in critical articles or reviews. For information, address St. Martin's Press, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10010.