At last, a book for the American Idle. Here is a punny new dictionary of inventive definitions of real words.

Acrimony: Spousal support payments following bitter divorce
Friction: Novel that rubs you the wrong way
Negligence: Woman's forgotten dressing gown
Zinfandel: Heathen wine

Ranging from the merely fetched (Spaniel: Iberian canine) to the far-fetched (Buccaneer: Piracy in corn pricing) to the neurologically suspect (Giraffe: Very tall spotted decanter), Semantricks will surprise, delight, and even stump the most word-wary pundits. Suffix it to say, you'll never look at diphthong the same way again.