Fatal Distraction

Or How I Conquered My Addiction to Celebrities and Got a Life

Emmi Fredericks

St. Martin's Griffin/Thomas Dunne Books

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"My name is Eliza H., and I am a celebraholic."

So begins this cautionary tale of how celebraholism can ruin one's life-- or at least one's twenties.

Once, Eliza dreamed of walking down the aisle (at the Oscars) and having a meaningful existence (every minute of which would be chronicled by People magazine). But by her twenties, her soaring ambitions have been reduced to friendships with two people who have some small chance at fame: Danny, a gorgeous and sadly untalented actor, and the unscrupulous Dinah, who has no attribute she will not exploit.

Oh, and not to mention a lot of E! True Hollywood Stories and The National Enquirer.

But when her boyfriend dumps her because she has no life, Eliza resolves to try to kick her celebraholism once and for all. Consulting a sham shrink and going cold turkey on People, Eliza seems to be on the rough road to recovery when the unexpected happens: Dinah's boyfriend, white rapper Lylo, is involved in a hit-and-run accident that claims the life of a beloved citizen-- bringing Dinah tantalizingly close to fame...and jail.

Can Eliza get Danny his big break as a cute but expendable sidekick in action flicks? Will she save Dinah from taking the fall? Or will this finally be the opportunity for the Barbara Walters interview she's waited for her whole life? Hip, humorous, and self-aware, this sublimely witty novel parodies today's cult of celebrity with hilarity and sympathy.

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Book Excerpts

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Chapter One

In which I Introduce the Affliction of Our Age

A warning to the reader . . .

This story is not for the faint of heart. While mine is ultimately a tale of triumph, it is also a harrowing chronicle of a trial of the human spirit. So, if you're not in the mood for peril and heartache, just put the book down. You can find enlightenment and self-awareness some other time. It's okay by me.

All right. Now that we've sorted out the players from the poseurs, let's continue.

A plague is sweeping America. An addiction that afflicts the unsuspecting citizen

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Reviews

Praise for Fatal Distraction

"An extremely witty, supremely cringe-worthy, and highly original take on the cult of celebrity-- from a desperate wanna-be's point of view. Her scheming and conniving ways to get herself and her friends noticed by the public are laugh-out-loud funny but, ultimately, rather moving. While the book's wily heroine mightn't deserve fame and fortune, expect its author to be catapulted into the limelight soon."
- Adèle Lang, bestselling author of Confessions of A Sociopathic Social Climber

"Hip, witty, laugh-out-loud funny-- for every woman (like me) who claims to read the Enquirer ironically-- yeah, right!"
- Sue Margolis, author of Apocalipstick

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About the Author

Emmi Fredericks

Emmi Fredericks has been a celebraholic ever since she asked the doctor who delivered her, "Are you someone?" She is a graduate of Vassar and should know not to read things like The National Enquirer, but she does and is no longer ashamed of it. She lives in New York City with her husband and basset hound. Her young-adult novel, The True Meaning of Cleavage, was published in 2003, but it has no famous people in it.

Emmi Fredericks

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Available Formats and Book Details

Fatal Distraction
Or How I Conquered My Addiction to Celebrities and Got a Life
Emmi Fredericks

Trade Paperback

Trade Paperback
St. Martin's Press
St. Martin's Griffin/Thomas Dunne Books
January 2005
Trade Paperback
ISBN: 9780312312954
ISBN10: 0312312954
5 1/2 x 8 1/4 inches, 304 pages, Includes black-and-white line drawings throughout
$18.99

e-Book Agency

e-Book Agency
St. Martin's Press
Thomas Dunne Books
March 2014
e-Book Agency
ISBN: 9781466865457
ISBN10: 1466865458
304 pages, Includes black-and-white line drawings throughout
$7.99
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From The Publisher

St. Martin's Griffin

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