Macmillan Childrens Publishing Group
High Holiday Porn

High Holiday Porn

A Memoir

Eytan Bayme

St. Martin's Press

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Eytan Bayme went to Jewish day school and Jewish camp. He lived across the street from a synagogue in the Bronx, which he attended weekly, and ate strictly kosher food for most of his childhood. Yet even at the age of six, he wanted to know what the deal was with those Pizza Huts and Burger Kings that he wasn't allowed into "God wouldn't put them on earth if He didn't mean for us to try them," he thought. Wasn't that obvious? Also, why can't he stop thinking about his female classmates in bed, late at night, with his little brother not five feet away; and how come the starting line-up for the 1986 Mets keep creeping into those fantasies? Religious life is difficult enough without the urges of a typical adolescent boy, yet Eytan's urges develop well before his teens, and they just keep on developing and developing.

High Holiday Porn is a heartwarming and hilarious story about learning to become an adult. It chronicles how an anxious boy finally stops masturbating in public, gets the girl, grows up, and begrudgingly makes peace with the unfairness of life and love. It's a funny, fantasy-laden, usually embarrassing, sometimes raunchy and always outrageous look at coming of age that will resonate with anyone who ever felt awkward growing up.

EXCERPT

CHAPTER 1

STAAARVING



THE FORBIDDEN DUNKIN' DONUTS was only a few blocks from our home. As my mother walked us past the storefront, I caught a brief glimpse of the cream-filled, jelly-engorged, and rainbow-sprinkled...

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About the author

Eytan Bayme

Eytan Bayme is a graduate of McGill University and a former stage actor. Originally from New York City, he lives with his wife in London. High Holiday Porn is his first book.

Eytan Bayme

Eytan Bayme

From the Publisher

St. Martin's Press

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