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Macmillan Childrens Publishing Group
John Dies at the End

John Dies at the End

Updated Special Edition

John Dies at the End (Volume 1)

David Wong

St. Martin's Griffin

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John Dies at the End is a genre-bending, humorous account of two college drop-outs inadvertently charged with saving their small town—and the world—from a host of supernatural and paranormal invasions.

This edition is newly rewritten by the author with additional material and an even more epic epic of slackers versus the occult!

"David Wong has updated the Lovecraft tradition and infused it with humor that rather than lessening the horror, increases it dramatically. Every time I set the book down, I was wary that something really was afoot, that there were creatures I couldn't see, and that because I suspected this, I was next. Engaging, comic, and terrifying." —Joe Garden, Features Editor, The Onion

"Wong is like a mash-up of Douglas Adams and Stephen King... 'page-turner' is an understatement." —Don Coscarelli, director, Phantasm I-V, Bubba Ho-tep

STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why? You just have to trust me.

The important thing is thi… More…

John Dies at the End is a genre-bending, humorous account of two college drop-outs inadvertently charged with saving their small town—and the world—from a host of supernatural and paranormal invasions.

This edition is newly rewritten by the author with additional material and an even more epic epic of slackers versus the occult!

"David Wong has updated the Lovecraft tradition and infused it with humor that rather than lessening the horror, increases it dramatically. Every time I set the book down, I was wary that something really was afoot, that there were creatures I couldn't see, and that because I suspected this, I was next. Engaging, comic, and terrifying." —Joe Garden, Features Editor, The Onion

"Wong is like a mash-up of Douglas Adams and Stephen King... 'page-turner' is an understatement." —Don Coscarelli, director, Phantasm I-V, Bubba Ho-tep

STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why? You just have to trust me.

The important thing is this: The drug is called Soy Sauce and it gives users a window into another dimension. John and I never had the chance to say no. You still do. I'm sorry to have involved you in this, I really am. But as you read about these terrible events and the very dark epoch the world is about to enter as a result, it is crucial you keep one thing in mind: None of this was my fault.

Less…

CHAPTER 1

THE LEVITATING “JAMAICAN”



THEY SAY LOS Angeles is like The Wizard of Oz. One minute it’s small-town monochrome neighborhoods and then boom—all of a sudden you’re in a sprawling Technicolor...

Praise for John Dies at the End

One of NPR's 100 Favorite Horror Stories 2018

John Dies at the End…[is] a case of the author trying to depict actual, soul-sucking lunacy, and succeeding with flying colors.” —Fangoria

“David Wong is like a mash-up of Douglas Adams and Stephen King . . . ‘page-turner' is an understatement.” —Don Coscarelli, director, Phantasm I–V and Bubba Ho-tep

“David Wong has managed to write that rarest of things---a genuinely scary story.” —David Wellington, author of Monster Island and Vampire Zero

“The rare genre novel that manages to keep its sense of humor strong without ever diminishing the scares.” —The Onion AV Club

“Sure to please the Fangoria set while appealing to a wider audience, the book's smart take on fear manages to tap into readers' existential dread on one page, then have them laughing the next.” —Publishers Weekly

“When it's funny, it's laugh-out-loud funny, yet when the situation calls for chills, it provides them in spades.” —Kirkus Reviews

"That rarest of things—a genuinely scary story." —David Wellington, author of Monster Island, Vampire Zero

"John Dies at the End has a cult following for a reason: it's horrific, thought-provoking, and hilarious all at once. This is one of the most entertaining and addictive novels I've ever read." —Jacob Kier, Publisher, Permuted Press

- … More…

One of NPR's 100 Favorite Horror Stories 2018

John Dies at the End…[is] a case of the author trying to depict actual, soul-sucking lunacy, and succeeding with flying colors.” —Fangoria

“David Wong is like a mash-up of Douglas Adams and Stephen King . . . ‘page-turner' is an understatement.” —Don Coscarelli, director, Phantasm I–V and Bubba Ho-tep

“David Wong has managed to write that rarest of things---a genuinely scary story.” —David Wellington, author of Monster Island and Vampire Zero

“The rare genre novel that manages to keep its sense of humor strong without ever diminishing the scares.” —The Onion AV Club

“Sure to please the Fangoria set while appealing to a wider audience, the book's smart take on fear manages to tap into readers' existential dread on one page, then have them laughing the next.” —Publishers Weekly

“When it's funny, it's laugh-out-loud funny, yet when the situation calls for chills, it provides them in spades.” —Kirkus Reviews

"That rarest of things—a genuinely scary story." —David Wellington, author of Monster Island, Vampire Zero

"John Dies at the End has a cult following for a reason: it's horrific, thought-provoking, and hilarious all at once. This is one of the most entertaining and addictive novels I've ever read." —Jacob Kier, Publisher, Permuted Press

- Less…

Reviews from Goodreads

David Wong

DAVID WONG is the pseudonym of Jason Pargin, New York Times bestselling author of the John Dies at the End series as well as the award-winning Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits. His essays at Cracked.com have been read by tens of millions of people around the world. ZOEY PUNCHES THE FUTURE IN THE DICK: A Novel, the second book in the Zoey Ashe series, arrives in October of 2020.

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