1Antigone
I asked my father, once, why he chose to curse us before we were born. Because to be born as my siblings and I were was to be doomed from the start. We were unique among our people, pieced together from whatever random combination of genes our two parents provided. Table-scrap children.
He didn’t say, as my mother had, a year before, “We didn’t think it was a curse.”
He was far too unsentimental for that.
“We thought,” he said to me, “it was a curse worth bearing.”
An honest man, and now a dead one.
* * *
He was in the courtyard, the man who killed my father. Oh, perhaps he hadn’t held the blade, but the coup that wrenched political power from my father’s hands and then trampled him beneath its boots was Kreon’s coup, undergone for Kreon, by Kreon.
He was in the casual version of his uniform, pants tucked into boots, shirt tucked into pants, forehead dotted with sweat, the morning sun already applying pressure. He bent his head to listen to the head of his guard, Nikias. They were too far away for me to hear.
I was on a balcony, nestled in ivy that grew only here, in the High Commander’s courtyard, where no amount of water scarcity in other parts of the city could convince Kreon to sacrifice beauty. People will permit a High Commander his small indulgences, I had heard him say once. It is such a difficult job.
I imagined he was right—it was a difficult job, keeping a tight fist for so long. But I wasn’t sure any amount of ivy could make this place beautiful to me.
Nikias moved away from Kreon, no doubt sent on some small mission. My uncle’s eyes lifted to mine. He nodded in greeting.
My throat tightened. I disappeared into the leaves.
* * *
After the fighting had ceased, after we had found our father and mother’s bodies in the streets, washed them, prayed over them; after I had Extracted their ichor, too young for the responsibility and yet the only ones to do it; after we had stored what was left of them in the Archive; after all that, Kreon had summoned us to this house, to that courtyard where the ivy grew and the street spilled in, and, in the presence of all who had ears to hear, told us we were welcome to live with him there. To this day, I’m not sure what prompted this act of generosity. We disgust Kreon, as we disgust many in this city, because of our origins.
Perhaps it was because we were family, and there were rules for family, and Kreon loved rules. Kreon was Oedipus’s brother, Oedipus’s shadow. A man of the blade instead of a man of the mind. At family gatherings when I was young, he was known for breaking things—glasses, plates, toys—just from handling them too roughly. Once, my mother asked him to brush Ismene’s hair for her, and Ismene spent the entire time trying not to cry as he ripped knots out of her head. He didn’t know how to be teased; he only laughed at other people, never himself.
Perhaps it wasn’t because we were family—perhaps it was because we were children of Oedipus, warped though we were by our genes. And Oedipus had almost started a revolution—he was a symbol, and so were we. And what better way to take the power from a symbol than to claim it as your own?
So when Kreon told us we were welcome to live in his house, I knew what the consequences would be: he would let Polyneikes and Eteocles and Ismene and me live, but we would do so at his pleasure. We would live in his house, lending legitimacy to his rule, and he would keep his eye on us.
We thank you for your generosity, I had told him, in the moment.
Copyright © 2023 by Veronica Roth
