INTRODUCTION



COMMON is going to business school because Dad approves, though your dream is to be a Navy SEAL or become a digital nomad.

COMMON is continuing to eat crappy food because you don’t have the time to prepare healthy meals.

COMMON is knowing your relationship isn’t going to last but not having the courage to end it.

COMMON is blowing off studying for the kegger—you’ll make up the studying the next day.

COMMON is blaming your parents for your less savory qualities, rather than taking control of your mind and life to change things for the better.

COMMON is dreaming about becoming an über-successful entrepreneur during your nine-to-five, yet not taking definitive, daily action toward the goal.

COMMON is keeping your mouth shut when you see abuse or injustice because you’re afraid to take any action.

COMMON is knowing there’s an entrepreneur, warrior, artist, teacher, or influencer inside you, but you’re too paralyzed by imposter syndrome to pursue it.

DON’T LET THIS BE YOU.

If any of the above statements define you in some way, then it’s time to take charge of, and commit to, a new way.

I’m Mark Divine. If you’re familiar with my mission, thank you for joining me on yet another journey. If we’re just meeting, here’s the lowdown: I’m a college athlete turned CPA who ditched corporate America to become an elite Navy SEAL, then entrepreneur, author, speaker, professor of leadership, and philanthropist. I’m the creator of SEALFIT, Kokoro Yoga, and Unbeatable Mind, and I’ve written six books, including New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and Amazon bestsellers.

I look really good on paper, right? So what.

Here’s the million-dollar question: What makes me qualified to teach you?

Let me start by telling you that it’s not my credentials. Though you might view them as uncommon, they’re just outward signs that I can think relatively well. The real reason I can guide you to your Uncommon Life is because I ripped each one of the opening statements from the pages of my own life. The reason I’m the guy is because I used to be common myself.

In the navy, common is what we called SOP: Standard Operating Procedure. Common is a trait shared by two or more individuals, a behavior that appears frequently, or a truth that is well known by a community.1 We are groomed to be common by family, trained to toe the line in school, and cajoled to conform by peer groups and social media.

Let’s face it, common is, well, the norm. It’s perfectly acceptable to be common. But trust me on this: it is worth it to be uncommon. There is joy and freedom like you cannot imagine once you align your thoughts with your actions to live your unique and purpose-fueled life. To be uncommon, it is critical to rewire the fragmented and limited mindset you have been trained with. An uncommon mindset is integrated and exponential in capacity. Mastering innate physical, mental, emotional, intuitional, and spiritual intelligences, or what I call the five mountains, is the key to unlock this mindset. I’ve spent over three decades mastering my five mountains, allowing me to break free from the prison of a common, predictable life. Freedom isn’t free and it takes work, but it is seriously worth it. I wrote this book to teach you how to master your five mountains so you can live the Uncommon Life too.

I know we are not all born equal in the sense that we’re not all gifted with genius IQs like Marilyn vos Savant2 or with the ability to compose music like Hans Zimmer. Few of us can draw like David Hockney, cook like Gordon Ramsay, or run like Lamont Jacobs.3 Some of us know the square root of 324 off the top of our heads, but most of us have forgotten the basic multiplication tables by adulthood, as we’re busy launching careers, paying bills, or raising kids. I admit to possessing none of the above abilities, in case you’re wondering. But I have learned that though everyone can’t be a prodigy, everybody does have vast, untapped potential. That potential lies within the mind, yet it remains dormant until one learns to break free. Break free from what? From the conditioning that is designed to keep you limited and dependent. Society’s mental training system is customized to keep you trapped in common-land so it can feed off your money, time, and energy.

My mental training began with competitive swimming, which gave me a glimpse of my mind’s power. Competitive sports enabled me to redirect my energy away from the partying during college and taught me how to control my breathing and to visualize success. These rudimentary skills played a crucial role in preparing me for the navy’s Basic Underwater Demolition/SEAL (BUD/S) training that came a few years later. I’m grateful for the physical aptitude I was born with to be an athlete. That’s because as I mastered my physical mountain, a glaring spotlight was pointed at the other mountains that needed tending—my mental, emotional, intuitional, and spiritual intelligences. Turning my attention to training these is what led to the breakthrough.

I found mental toughness through sports and endless hours in the wilds of upstate New York. There was no task I would not tackle, no workout or sucky thing I would not do. But though I was the quintessential badass on the outside, there was a persistent feeling of emptiness, of not being enough on the inside. I’m not so sure I would’ve recognized that void were it not for my physical and mental strength casting a light on a glaring emotional imbalance. The hollowness I felt left me searching constantly for direction, for purpose, and for true love. The hole in me felt like the size of the Grand Canyon. I fit the picture of perfection on the outside. On the inside, an aching panic was clinging to me like the faint scent of chlorine after training at Lineberry Pool at Colgate University.

I was only subtly aware of this existential struggle and couldn’t grab onto it to study it closely. My family was averse to therapy in general and from my perspective lacked emotional awareness, let alone control. Emotional nuance was alien to my conditioned mind. So, I just ignored it, until I couldn’t any longer.

So yes, I was a common kid who grew into a common man. I followed the rules impressed on me by my family, my schooling, and society. I was afraid to be different, to speak my truth and risk being cast out. I didn’t know how to develop my inner strength beyond the basics of mental and physical toughness, so I accepted that living with chronic dissatisfaction was normal. Shame, negativity, jealousy, and self-questioning drove my behavior. I was convinced that true happiness was a fantasy or possessed by others somehow superior to me. I’d taken on the role of the overachiever yet was unraveling on the inside. My spirit was in a real slump.

Then, when I started my first career in Manhattan in 1985, I found meditation. After many hours training with this new tool, I received a life-changing sign from my intuition. No, it wasn’t a double rainbow after a tough day or an apparition of my great-grandfather telling me I was special. It was an actual sign in a window—and it was pointing me toward an Uncommon Life, which was out there waiting. I just had to commit to the challenge.

And I did.

I will tell the rest of that story later.

Being uncommon means moving closer to the best version of yourself every day. It means living with focus, confidence, and humility. Being uncommon means learning how to communicate honestly and effectively. At this juncture in my personal journey, it means reaching more people than I did the day before. I’m a living embodiment of self-mastery and purpose, and nothing brings me joy like watching more and more people discover their paths to mastery and purpose. But I’ve read my book reviews, and I know I’m not everyone’s cup of matcha. For every seven or eight that say, “Mark’s great!” and that my programs have been life-changing, someone comments that I’m virtuous to the point of boring or that I can’t relate to “real people” because my life is charmed. One reviewer actually said: “This guy thinks he invented the wheel.”

I’ve learned to learn from the critics. No matter how hard I strive, I know there is no perfect. There are always going to be folks who neither appreciate nor grasp my philosophy. Some think that I’m just another one of those Navy SEAL authors shouting: “Toughen up, you loser!” (Nothing could be further from the truth.) Others will label me a dreamer for having the audacity to want to impact one hundred million people in the next twenty-five years (I state this on my personal website markdivine.com). And others might think I’m a narcissist and living a fantasy. Maybe I am … but I can assure you that regardless of what anyone thinks of me, the value of becoming uncommon is well worth the effort. So why not go for it?

Accolades and awards are great but short-lived. To cultivate growth, we need to get real with ourselves and, sometimes, that means “reading the reviews.” That’s my first tip. Listening to my critics with an open heart has helped me to understand what’s working and see where I can improve.

Here’s the second tip: Don’t take yourself too seriously. I’m going to teach you how to discern between constructive criticism and cruelty. This will help you develop emotional resiliency and hone your intuition while maintaining your sense of humor. It’ll keep you going when the going gets tough.

Here’s the third and final tip to get us rolling: There’s always going to be someone on the sidelines telling you not to try something or that you’re doing it wrong or that you’ll never succeed. The wet blankets don’t vanish into thin air once you achieve a goal, fall in love, make lots of money, or give it all away. Just know that the critics are those unwilling to do the hard work themselves. We must learn when to bend our ears and when to turn our backs … or risk losing focus.

I’m still a work in progress, just as you are. When I fall hard, I bleed the same. I just get up quicker, learn what went wrong, and carry on with a smile. And no, I don’t think I invented the wheel (though, that would’ve been a nifty feat). But I’ve jumped through a lot of hoops and had thousands of special operators and other professionals to test my theories out on. I have failed and learned so many times so that you don’t have to. I’ve trained my ass off in all five mountains, have followed the advice of world leaders, mentors, peers, coaches, therapists, and even my trainees. Bottom line, I’ve spent my life in pursuit of breaking free from common-land. This book is my attempt to reach 100 percent of the people willing to invest time and energy to become the best version of themselves possible in their lifetime. Yes, that’s a lot of people and a lofty goal. Some might call it an impossible goal. But you know what we’re going to call it.…

I want you to start thinking about your Uncommon Goals.

Inertia, from the Latin iners, meaning lazy, is the name for the tendency of an object in motion to remain in motion, or an object at rest to remain at rest, unless acted upon by a force. As we know, this is Newton’s First Law of Motion and a quality that all objects made of measurable matter possess.4

Including humans.

Psychologists have a name for it. They call it human inertia.5 Once we’ve established a life trajectory, we continue that path until acted on by a greater force.6 We do this because it is comfortable, which is also mistaken for safe. And we do this despite the faint ache in our hearts and the nagging feeling in our guts that something is missing. We get comfortable, we get lazy, we listen to the voice in our head, ignore the yearnings of our heart, and stay the course.

Did you know it takes over 5,000 horsepower to move the average mainline locomotive from a stationary position, but it only takes around 30 horsepower to keep it going on a straight track at 130 miles per hour? This is the power of inertia.

The hardest part of any new self-development program is getting started. The second hardest part is getting comfortable with the discomfort of change. The third essential part is to keep going once you start. The shortest course in mental toughness is to not quit once you start something. You have started and are on your way. Now let’s get comfortable being uncomfortable, and don’t quit! This self-actualized Navy SEAL with decades of training under his belt (but no prodigious musical or mathematical talent whatsoever) will provide the blueprint to be uncommon and motivate you when you need it. You will beat the inertia of your common existence and change your life trajectory by following my training advice. That I can guarantee.

Welcome to your Uncommon Life.

Let’s do this …

Easy day!

* * *

THE UNCOMMON CONTRACT

Are you ready for this? Ready to tap your maximum potential, performance, and purpose, to live free from fear and regret? Are you ready to take responsibility each day to evolve into the very best version of yourself? Are you ready to be:

Healthier?More fit?More balanced?More focused?More clear-minded?More centered?More content?More peaceful?More truthful?More honorable?More connected?More whole?The quality of your life is not about the size of your bank account, the length of your résumé, or the power you wield over others. It is a measure of your wholeness as a human and how you show up in service to others. It is expressed through the strength and balance of your physical, mental, emotional, intuitional, and spiritual domains.

Ask yourself if you are really ready now to commit to this work. It would be a fail to get temporarily inspired and then go back to being common. So, decide now that being common is a thing of the past.

You are going to have to trust me, this knowledge, and this path, at first. As your training takes root, you will prove it to yourself. If you do the work with a serious but lighthearted attitude, it will pay real dividends quickly. But mastery will take a lifetime.

You have one life to live, so why not be uncommon?

You deserve it.

I would like you to sign a binding contract for this work with your highest and best self.

I know what you’re thinking: You really want me to sign a contract to commit to this training?

Yes, I do. If you aren’t going to sign it physically, then do it mentally.

The SEALs made me sign a contract. And that contract became my “all in, all the time” commitment. That contract supercharged my motivation and growth. It requires a burn-your-boats level of commitment to get uncommon results.

Having that level of commitment toward your growth will cause you to up your game too. You will hold yourself to the highest standard, even and especially when the going gets tough.

I, _______________________________________________, commit to becoming uncommon. I will work the practices and exercises offered in this book until I have them mastered. If I waver, I will get back on track. If I take a break, I will recommit. I will not quit. This is worth it. Period.

Signature: ________________________________________

Date: ____________________________________________

* * *

You must get comfortable with being uncomfortable to be uncommon. And when you do, you’ll yearn and strive to stay in that zone.

Think about that.

This book is about climbing the five mountains of consciousness to self-mastery in service to others. There is no fluff in these pages, so proceed with an open heart, cautious optimism, and a mindset that’s ready to do the work.

In Part I: Mastering Your Physical Mountain, we begin the journey by preparing our bodies to be as physically fit and healthy as possible for the climb.


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