INTRODUCTION



I wish I had been taught about mindfulness when I was a kid. It would have saved me a lot of time, trouble, and a whole bunch of drama.

I discovered mindfulness at a time in my life when everything seemed to be going wrong. My job sucked. I was single, but not happily so. I had a ton of credit card debt. I was eating and drinking too much. And on and on. I needed a change.

A friend of mine casually said over dinner one night, “Hey, maybe you can come with me to meditation class—it’s really been helpful for me.” Meditation class? There were few things I wanted to do less than go to a class to do what … just sit there? My life was a mess; I needed to take action, not just sit and pretend nothing was wrong.

She persisted, and so to appease her, I said yes. I thought I would go once, say, “It’s not for me, but hey, thanks,” and then never do it again. I went with her, wearing sweats and bringing a pillow (I’m not sure why I brought the pillow…), and together my friend and I walked into the meditation classroom.

It was at a Buddhist center, but my friend explained that this class wasn’t religious in any way, and there was no proselytizing or pushing of ideas; it was just a basic meditation class. I didn’t know what to expect, but I wasn’t expecting the people to look so … normal. The twenty or so people were diverse, and all dressed in their sweats, too (though no one else brought a pillow). The first thing I noticed was how calm everyone was.

We sat down wherever we wanted to sit (I sat near my friend, of course), and the instructor told us to just begin breathing, counting each breath in this way: breathe in as 1, breathe out as 2, breathe in as 1, breathe out as 2, over and over.

To be honest, my mind was racing and filled with a lot of judgment. How could breathing and counting all the way up to the number 2 be beneficial? Still, I was there, so I decided try it, because why not.

And I did it. And something inside me shifted just a little, tiny bit. It wasn’t like a magic Xanax pill experience, but more like something inside me released when I stopped doing. I realized from that first class how much energy I was burning all the time, how caught up in everything I always seemed to be.

Now I just stopped, and for a few brief moments, I let it all go.

Let me add that I was terrible at that first class. I don’t know how much actual meditating I did—probably very little.

My mind—which the instructor later told me was the part of my brain they call the “monkey mind,” the part that is constantly chattering inside—didn’t want to slow down and focus.

I had a difficult time concentrating on breathing in and out, 1 and 2. I had an itch, then another; I had to use the bathroom; I felt a leg cramp; I thought of things to add to my “to do list.” But, for a few brief moments I focused on 1 and on 2. And it was liberating.

I had originally planned to attend one class and then stop. Instead, I couldn’t wait for the second class, and the third, and so on. I didn’t feel like I was truly meditating for several months (hey, no judging!), but slowly I began to feel a little calmer, and I looked forward to having a place where I didn’t have to be more, do more, or try to have more. I could just let go and relax.

Now, years later, I’ve learned that mindfulness isn’t just about meditating—but meditating is a basic cornerstone to mindfulness. Breathing in and out, deeply, was an inner revolution that continues to this day.

In this little book, you’ll read about the key principles of mindfulness. I will also include simple tips and techniques to help get you started. I’ve tried to make it a little fun as well.

Mindfulness doesn’t mean you’re serious all the time, walk slowly, and speak only in a monotone. It means that you live authentically—and I authentically like to have a good time.

Be patient with yourself as you begin. Even if you aren’t a beginner, still, be patient with yourself. That’s another lifelong mindful practice.

I probably don’t have to remind you that you shouldn’t do things like meditate while operating heavy machinery or driving a car, but I’ll say it anyway. Use your common sense. Do what you can, where you can, when it’s appropriate to do so. Listen to your inner self give you clues about how to move forward in life.

Mindfulness helps us to avoid sudden, snap decisions (that usually end up causing unnecessary drama in our lives). Take it slow, one day at a time. You don’t have to be a perfect student; just give it a real try, and do the best you can. And then the next day, try again.

Sitting, doing nothing but breathing, and practicing mindfulness throughout the day may not seem like much, but trust me, it can change everything.



THE MINDFUL MANIFESTO


I now choose to live in the present moment, as much as I am able. Every day I will practice mindfulness through meditation and through deliberate actions. I allow myself to gently let go of what no longer serves me, and embrace the “now,” however it looks. In the present moment, I can make the most positive choices for my life. Mindfulness is my path, and I walk it joyfully.

Every morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most.

—BUDDHA



HERE, NOW


Perhaps the most basic—and most powerful—way to think about mindfulness can be expressed in two words: here, now. Mindfulness comes down to being here, and being here now. That’s it. Sounds so easy, until you try to do it for more than a few seconds or minutes at a time.

Try This—Here, Now

The simplest and most effective way to begin practicing mindfulness is the Here & Now technique. It’s so simple that at first you may not realize how powerful it is. Do it as often as you can, wherever you are.

The practice is simply this: focus on your breathing. As you breathe in, think the word “here.” As you breathe out, think the word “now.” You don’t have to think about what they mean—just focus on your breathing and the words. If your mind wanders, gently bring your attention back to here, now, here, now, here, now.

Try This—Why Mindfulness?

Here’s one of the most important things for you to do to ensure that you will stick with your mindfulness practice. In your journal, or on a blank sheet of paper, write down every reason you want to meditate.

You can list general things or specific things—whatever motivates you to lead a more mindful life. Some examples might be: to have better health, to slow your mind, to have less drama in your life, to become more awake and aware, to improve your brain function, or to have better communication in your relationships.

Why do this? If you know why you want to meditate, and how it will improve your life, you will be more motivated to continue to do it, especially on the days when it’s hard.


Copyright © 2020 by St. Martin’s Press.